Beautiful soul.
As you read this, what are you facing?
I imagine it’s something touch. A challenge. Maybe you’ve just come through your own personal storm … and if not, you can be fairly certain there’s one looming on the horizon.
One sure thing in this life is adversity. Even the Good Book tells us, “surely a man is born for adversity as the sparks fly upwards.”
I don’t mean to paint a bleak picture. Quite the contrary, in fact: we are united by our shared adversity. It’s the very fact that we are each different that joins us in our common humanity.
Everyone has something. A cross to bear. A challenge of some kind.
And for each person, that cross is as hard to bear as it is. There’s no shame in that. Think about in context of the bigger picture: if a papercut is the worst thing that has ever happened to you … it’s still the worst thing that has ever happened to you. Ever. Which means that it’s pretty bad.
Of course, most of us aren’t facing a papercut.
Life likes to throw so much more at us, doesn’t she?
Here are four keys to finding strength in adversity:
1. Friends and family
The people closest to you can be your greatest source of comfort, support, wisdom, guidance, and courage. They can offer you the perspective you need.
Those you love – and who love you – can offer you a shoulder to cry on, as well as solid practical support. It could be anything from a meal when you just can’t face cooking, to babysitting when you are out of action. It could be financial support, or help-in-kind. In fact, the range of support friends and family can offer is as endless as the range of things people do every day.
Don’t be afraid to ask – it’s not a sign of weakness. It shows you have the strength to be vulnerable, and get the help you need. Even more important: always remember to say “Thank You”. You’d be amazed at what a little well-placed gratitude can do, both for the person offering their help, and for your own sense of well-being. In fact, gratitude can be the
2. Faith gives focus
Having a sense of something bigger than yourself can carry you through the tough times. That sense that life has meaning and purpose can help us find comfort in the confusion that so often comes with a challenge. When we feel overwhelmed by what life throws at us, we can find wisdom and guidance in the writings we hold most sacred. Often, we can also find a wise mentor among the more learned in our faith.
The practices of faith lend a sense of rhythm and structure to an otherwise whirlwind of drama and pain. Meditation, prayer, reading your words of faith, meeting with like-minded souls – all of these support us and carry us through the tough times.
3. Feelings
Trust your gut. And give yourself time to grieve. You need to be gentle with yourself – no “pull yourself together” pep talks and mean self-talk that, in the end, only adds to your pain.
Sometimes, life is hard. Sometimes, you need to cry.
That’s okay. You’re allowed.
In fact, it can be helpful and healthy to let those tears flow. Did you know that when you cry, the pent-up cortisol flooding your bloodstream actual drains out in those tears. Cortisol is the stress hormone, and releasing it helps balance your mood and improve your outlook on life.
4. Face it: you’ve got this
Finally, never forget: you are strong enough to get through this. Tomorrow will bring a new dawn … and that will lead to a bright new day. It sounds trite, but it’s no less true for that. I don’t know what you’re facing. But I do know that you are strong. You’re fierce. You’ve got what it takes.
Even when it feels like you don’t.
Between those who love you, what you believe in, and allowing your emotions to guide you to your own personal truth, you have all you need to make it through. You’re stronger than you think.
And – above all – you are so loved.